Why Me?

March 6, 2019

Thank you to those who offered up prayers earlier today. I have good news as a result of your efforts! (See TMI below.)

Overall, I remain physically well and in relatively good spirits. Honestly, I can’t complain about anything. I truly feel that I am doing way better than I deserve. “Why me?” Has turned into such a glorious question for me. It started from a place of anger and hurt and has grown into a place of admiration and gratitude.

“UGH WHY ME?!” How many times have you said that? If you’re anything like me, it’s usually something I say when something negative is taking place. Why did I get cut off in the traffic jam? It’s quite humbling to see it from the other side. Why am I so blessed to not be vomiting in the bathroom every day? This journey is giving me a whole new perspective.

I had two beautiful, Christ-filled women visit me today. Being able to share life with women who know Jesus and radiate His amazing light, is a blessing you all should know. Find your sisters! I love being able to be real and completely human with people who don’t judge. People who love you right where you are. People who come along side of you and say, you are not alone.

Of course, I got to love on my amazing husband and beautiful baby girl again today. The highlight of every day is watching those two stroll through the door with smiles that light up the entire city!

TMI – Breast Update

Surprisingly, I’ve had a very easy time with my milk supply drying up. I pumped for a few minutes each day for about 4 days when I was first admitted. I haven’t pumped or had any leaking or discomfort issues in 10 days. Which is not the average story for many women when weaning their babes.

This entire time, my right breast had remained a bit more firm than the left. My port is on the right upper chest wall and I attributed that to some of the differences between each side. The lactation consultants all said that it was not uncommon for one breast to dry up before the other, and reassured me that things seemed to be going fine.

However, this morning I noticed that the right breast was even more firm, knotty even, and it was tender to the touch. (I have had no pain whatsoever, until today.) With chemotherapy comes a lot of antibiotics, antivirals, and antifungals. They give these so that you don’t get an infection! Very important, but taking those things can actually mask an active infection. Scary.

In order to rule out an infection or abscess, I had an ultrasound performed. Thankfully, NO INFECTION! So, thank you for praying for good results. For now, we’re just waiting it out, and continuing to pray that it’s just part of the normal biological process and there will be no need for interventions.

Thank You

I will forever try to express my gratitude for all of you following our journey. Key word, try. There aren’t enough “thanks” in the world.

~E